Life, Loss & Lemonade
Posted on 7th February 2012 at 12:10
I was with a friend last week who suddenly said to me, “ Carole you’re the best lemonade maker I know.” This caught me by surprise and I raised my eyebrows at her accordingly – after all we were sitting drinking tea on a very cold winter’s day. The last thing I’d been thinking of was lemonade.
Seeing my quizzical look she explained – you know that expression “when life gives you lemons make lemonade” Well you always seem to be able to find the positive in any situation. That set me thinking.
Many of us have piles of lemons life has thrown at us but lemonade isn’t just made of lemon. You also need water & sugar. Even then you don’t have lemonade, you have a pile of ingredients. In order to get lemonade you need to take actions – juicing the lemons, dissolving the sugar in water, combining it all in a jug and refrigerating. Simple enough actions but actions none the less.
What about those lemons that life threw at us years ago, that we decided to try to ignore. We put them in a cupboard in our minds where they’ve been getting mouldier and more rancid every day. It would be impossible to make lemonade from these so what to do? Clearly the only thing to do is get rid of them! Clean out our internal store cupboard, so that it no longer harbours rotten lemons that are slowly poisoning our entire life.
The Grief Recovery Method taught me that it is possible to clean house even in a blizzard of in-coming lemons. Dealing with the unresolved grief in my heart allowed me to once again fully participate in life, rather than drift along merely existing. Grief Recovery means taking the correct actions, rather than waiting passively for time to pass. As we’ve already mentioned time alone results in mould not refreshment. Life still throws me lemons. Sometimes they come in thick and fast but now I’ve learned the actions I need to take and I can cope.
The Grief Recovery actions can be learned by reading the Grief Recovery handbook available from this site or from your local library. But remember, reading the method may wake up your taste buds but actually completing the actions in the recipe gets you the refreshment you need.
Carole Henderson was Batchelor is a Grief Recovery Specialist and Director of Grief Recovery (UK). She can be reached on 01234 862218 or firstname.lastname@example.org
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